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Dirty Waterproof Novelty Playing Cards by Little Genie
- $34.99
- $34.99
- Unit price
- per
Premium waterproof design in Little Genie Dirty Playing Cards ensures durability through spills and chaos. Anatomically detailed penis illustrations printed on standard deck format provide humorous party entertainment that actually plays like real cards.
Key Features:
Waterproof plastic coating resists spills, moisture, and sweat throughout parties
Anatomically detailed penis designs guarantee shock value and genuine laughter
Professional card stock maintains shuffle-ability through multiple game nights
Standard 54-card deck plays any traditional card game flawlessly
Durable finish prevents deterioration despite repeated handling and transportation
Vendor:
Little Genie
SKU:
NEW-10376
Availability:
In stock
Product type:
Sex Games, Coupons and Tricks
Please hurry! Only 2 left in stock
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Dirty Waterproof Novelty Playing Cards flip game night on its head with hilariously anatomical penis designs printed on durable, waterproof cards. Perfect for parties where crude humour meets actual playability, these cards stay crisp through spilled drinks and sweaty hands.
Why choose the Dirty Waterproof Novelty Playing Cards by
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📦 Discreet plain-wrapped delivery • 💳 Private billing • ↩️ Easy size-swap returns |
What it does
Each card features boldly rendered, anatomically detailed penis illustrations that provoke genuine laughs before anyone even deals a hand. Unlike standard playing cards that get sticky and warped within an hour of drinking, these maintain their structure and shuffle-ability no matter how many cocktails get spilled across the table. Waterproof treatment penetrates the card stock itself, preventing the paper from absorbing moisture and swelling.
Friends will genuinely question whether you dropped real money on premium poker cards just to mess with them. Sex Swings And Slings pair well with party games for couples who want to escalate the evening beyond cards. Shuffle like you're about to deal serious poker—except your friends will do a double-take the moment cards hit the table.
Specifications
- Card dimensions: 2.5 x 3.5 inches (63 x 89mm), standard poker size
- Deck contents: 52 cards plus 2 jokers, full waterproof coating
- Card stock: High-quality with professional printing
- Finish: Durable plastic coating resistant to spills, sweat, and repeated handling
- Packaging: Standard card box format for easy storage
Fit and sizing
These are standard poker cards, so sizing isn't relevant in the traditional sense—they're 2.5 x 3.5 inches, the same as every other deck you've ever played with. What matters is grip and handling. Cockringshop specialise in products for men and couples looking to add fun to their social and intimate lives, and these cards work for any group size around a table. Hold them firmly during shuffles; the waterproof coating makes them slightly slicker than regular cards, but that's part of the charm. Comfort here means being able to laugh without worrying your drinks will destroy them.
How to use it
Crack open the box and shuffle like normal. Deal them out however you usually would—Texas Hold'em, Five Card Draw, Blackjack, Solitaire—the dirty designs won't interfere with game mechanics at all. Printed images are positioned on the card faces so they don't block the actual numbers and suits you need to play.
Start with a casual hand and watch faces shift from confusion to recognition to full belly laughs as people realise what they're holding. Casually slide a wet glass across the deck without panic, knowing nothing's getting ruined. Pass them around between rounds; the durability means they'll handle being examined, photographed, or shown off without degrading. Sit back and enjoy the reaction cycle every single time new people notice what they're actually playing with.
Feature breakdown
| Feature | Specification | Benefit | Experience |
|---|---|---|---|
| Waterproof coating | Penetrates card stock, not just surface | Moisture doesn't warp or swell cards | Casually slide wet glasses across the deck |
| Anatomical designs | Boldly rendered, range comedic to lifelike | Guaranteed laughs before cards are played | Friends do a double-take when they see them |
| Textured plastic finish | Durable coating on premium card stock | Fingers grip even when palms sweat | Shuffles smoothly all night without slipping |
| Standard poker dimensions | 2.5 x 3.5 inches, 52 cards plus 2 jokers | Works with any card game you know | Play Hold'em, Blackjack, Solitaire normally |
Who it suits
These cards work brilliantly for anyone throwing a party where laughs matter more than sophistication, especially groups with crude senses of humour who appreciate absurdist comedy. Drunk poker nights, house parties, gatherings where the goal is genuine entertainment—this is where they shine. They're conversation starters that actually work, and people genuinely enjoy passing them around and showing them off.
Skip these if you're hosting a formal game night or want cards that stay entirely professional. If your crew doesn't vibe with crude humour or explicit imagery, there's no point buying them. They're not subtle, and they're not designed to be. Expect laughs, not sophistication.
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Tested and quality-checked Every new line we stock is hands-on tested before it ever goes live — we power it up, run it through its functions, and check it for safety and for how it actually performs. Overseas orders get a second function-test right before they ship, so a dead motor never reaches your door. Nothing is used for its intended purpose; it is checked, inspected, and re-boxed. What that means for you is simple: the unit you open is one we already know works. See how we test every product → |
How it compares
Novelty playing cards come in two types: cheap ones that crumble after one use, and durable ones like these. Standard novelty decks use basic paper and simple printing that absorbs liquid and warps within an hour. These use waterproof coating that penetrates the card stock itself, so spilled drinks don't destroy them. Andrew Christian offers premium apparel for men and couples, a different category altogether. If durability and actual playability matter alongside the joke, waterproofed cards outlast cheap novelty decks by miles.
| Please read — safety first. Put the ring on before you are fully erect and use plenty of water-based lubricant so it slides on without pinching. Keep wear time short — no more than 20 minutes while you are getting used to it, and never fall asleep wearing one. Take it off straight away if you feel numbness, coldness, a change in colour, or any pain, as these mean blood flow has been cut off too far. Never share between partners without cleaning the item first or using a fresh condom. This information is general in nature only and is not medical or professional advice, and does not take your personal circumstances into account. Stop use and speak with a qualified medical professional if you have a relevant health condition, take medication for erectile function or blood pressure, or notice pain, numbness, or discolouration that does not settle. |
What you can use it with
Pair these with Couples Intimacy Kits to escalate party games into intimate challenges for two. Card games work as foreplay or post-game entertainment when couples want to add playfulness to their time together. The novelty factor keeps things light while building anticipation, and the waterproof coating means they survive whatever happens next.
More from Little Genie
Little Genie makes sex games, coupons, and tricks designed to add humour and fun to parties and intimate moments. Browse the full range for other conversation starters and novelty items that deliver genuine laughs alongside real functionality.
Read more before you buy
Want to explore what makes games and tricks work for couples and groups? What Is The International Sex Guide covers the wider world of adult products and how to choose what suits your crew.
Why buy the Dirty Waterproof Novelty Playing Cards by Little Genie
Want firmer, longer-lasting results without the guesswork? Buy the Dirty Waterproof Novelty Playing Cards by Little Genie from The Cock Ring Store. Every product is genuine and function-tested and quality-checked before it ships. Cockringshop delivers in discreet packaging so your order arrives private and secure. Precise sizing, honest reviews, and discreet delivery Australia-wide. The Cock Ring Store ships discreetly Australia-wide.
Shipping Information & Policy
Cockringshop.com.au ships with Australia Post. We ship from Sydney.
All in-stock orders placed before 12pm AEST (Sydney Time) on business days are generally processed on the same day. Packages are usually received 1-6 business days after shipping, but may subject to any postage carrier related delays beyond our control.
Free standard shipping on orders shipped within Australia above $200. For orders below $200 standard shipping within Australia is $12.95 and will be added at checkout.
Orders addressed to P.O box, G.P.O box or Parcel Collect will be handled by Australia Post. Extra time should be allocated for these orders.
Shipping Transit Times (Including Free Shipping)
Shipping time refers to the estimated time that it will take to deliver your order after it’s ready to ship (Please note this does not include time to process your order). Shipping time does not commence after your order is put through but begins the moment your order has been processed and is ready to dispatch via the our freight carrier..
1. Major City & Metro Areas (within Australia)
All in stock orders are generally processed on the same day the order was placed on business days for orders received before 12pm. Generally, orders are processed and shipped the same day or next business day.
Orders are typically received 1-6 business days after shipping. For larger packages please allow an extra 1-2 business days for delivery.
If no one is available at your delivery address to accept your order a second delivery may be scheduled or you will be notified that your order can be collected from the nearest depot location.
2. Rural Areas (within Australia)
All orders are generally processed on the same day the order was placed on business days before 12pm.
Generally, orders are processed and shipped the same day or next Business day.
Packages below 2kg are usually received 3-6 business days after shipping. For larger packages please allow an extra 1-2 business days for delivery.
If no one is available at your delivery address to accept your order a second delivery may be scheduled or you will be notified that your order can be collected from the local Australia Post depot.
International Shipping
The price for international shipping is AU$12.95 for orders equal to or below 0.399kg (399grams), and AU$22.95 for orders with a total weight equal to or above 0.4kg (400 grams).
All in-stock orders placed before 12pm AEST (Sydney Time) on business days are generally processed on the same day. Packages are usually received 6-30 business days after shipping.
If no one is available at your delivery address to accept your order a second delivery may be scheduled or you will be notified that your order can be collected from your nearest delivery depot.
Please note in regards to all orders
– These expected delivery dates/times are based on carrier shipping practices, your destination, and the items in your order.
– Expected delivery dates are estimates. Orders can be delayed due to fraud verification or the time of the order being placed. Items that are not regularly stocked cannot be held to the expected delivery dates.
– Orders may be delivered in separate shipments.
– The order cut off times are based on normal Business Hours and exclude weekends and Holidays: Monday – Friday 12 pm
– When your order ships you will receive an email from us with a link to track your order. If you receive your tracking number before 6 pm (AEST) it may not be updated on the Carrier’s website until that evening.
Due to large amounts of online credit card fraud, all orders are subject to approval by our payment verification department. We will notify you by phone or email should your order be delayed.
Returns Policy
We have a 14 day return policy, which means you have 14 days after receiving your item to request a refund for any defective products.
Returns and exchanges are only available for faulty items, goods not as described, or in some instances, for incorrect sizing.
Due to health and safety regulations, cockringshop.com.au cannot resell any returned or exchanged products.
This policy is in place to prioritise your well-being and ensure that you receive the highest standard of hygiene and quality in all products.
To be eligible for a refund, your item must be in the same condition that you received it, unworn or unused, with tags, and in its original packaging.
You’ll also need the receipt or proof of purchase. We do not issue refunds for change of mind or incorrect choice.
Under Australian Consumer Law, we are not obliged to accept returns for “incorrect choice” or “change of mind” so please choose your products carefully.
Any freight and insurance costs to return the item to us are at your expense. This includes the liability for any lost freight – send via registered post.
If your return request is accepted, we will provide you with all instructions on how and where to send your package. Items sent back to us without first requesting a return will not be accepted.
Damages and issues
Please inspect your order upon reception and contact us immediately if the item is defective, damaged or if you receive the wrong item, so that we can evaluate the issue and make it right.
Exceptions / non-returnable items
We do not accept returns for any products that have change of mind, damaged products, or for products that have been used or do not have their original packaging.
Please get in touch if you have questions or concerns about your specific item.
Unfortunately, we cannot accept returns on sale items or gift cards.
Refunds
We will notify you once we’ve received and inspected your return, and let you know if the refund was approved or not. If approved, you’ll be automatically refunded on your original payment method within 7 business days.
Please remember it can take some time for your bank or credit card company to process and post the refund
Frequently Asked Questions
What is the Little Genie Dirty Waterproof Novelty Playing Cards and how do they differ from standard poker decks?
Little Genie Dirty Waterproof Novelty Playing Cards are 54-card playing decks featuring anatomically detailed penis illustrations on every card face. Waterproof plastic coating protects against spills, sweat, and moisture that would destroy regular cards. Unlike novelty decks that deteriorate after one use, these maintain shuffle-ability and structural integrity through multiple parties. Customers report they generate immediate shock-and-laughter reactions while functioning as legitimate poker decks for any card game.
Does the Little Genie Dirty Waterproof Novelty Playing Cards' waterproof coating actually prevent liquid damage during drinking games?
Plastic sealing genuinely protects card stock from absorbing moisture rather than just beading liquid on the surface. Beer, cocktails, and sweat roll off without leaving marks or warping the paper underneath. In our experience selling novelty products, standard cards become sticky and unusable within an hour of drinking; these maintain crisp shuffling through entire evenings. Professional plastic finish means you can confidently pass cards around without panic about ruining your deck.
Are the Little Genie Dirty Waterproof Novelty Playing Cards suitable for mixed groups or only for crude audiences?
Anatomical detail makes these best suited for adults comfortable with explicit sexual imagery and crude humor. Conservative groups or easily offended people won't appreciate the raunchy designs covering every card. Most buyers use them specifically for bachelor parties, bachelorette events, or friend circles where raunchiness is baseline entertainment. Standard suits and numbers remain completely visible, so gameplay functions identically whether your audience finds the penis designs hilarious or uncomfortable.
Which occasions work best for bringing the Little Genie Dirty Waterproof Novelty Playing Cards to guarantee maximum laughs and engagement?
Bachelor and bachelorette parties, college game nights, and adult friend groups with crude senses of humor get the most entertainment value. Poker nights transform from routine gameplay into memorable experiences when cards featuring bold anatomical designs hit the table. Customers tell us people still reference these decks weeks after parties end, making them genuinely conversation-starting novelties. Travel-friendly sizing means you can pack them for weekends without taking up space.
Can you actually play serious card games with the Little Genie Dirty Waterproof Novelty Playing Cards or are they purely decoration?
Full 52-card deck plus jokers maintains all standard suits, values, and functionality for Texas Hold'em, Five Card Draw, Blackjack, or any traditional game. Penis illustrations are positioned on card faces without blocking numbers or suits needed for gameplay. Slightly slicker waterproof finish requires marginally firmer grip during shuffles but doesn't compromise card mechanics. Testing confirmed these work identically to premium poker decks while delivering anatomical humor simultaneously.
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